You never have to clean your house again
Yes you read that right.
That chore!!! When you swiftly go around, tidying, scrubbing, bleaching, shoving things in recesses of the already filled cupboards and drawers is stressful to say the least and worst, it seems never ending.
We do this tedious routine continuously and every time it feels like an imposition, taking our precious time for a futile effort to keep things looking decent. In years we become numb to it and do it mindlessly because grandma instilled in us that there is a place for everything and everything in its place. We do it because firstly, we can’t live in a mess, secondly because we need order in the family home and thirdly because it all ought to look decent so that whoever visits would see that we are not skanky.
Grandma was right – but you can have all this without the boring and stressful element of doing the chore. I’ll explain how in a minute.
Whether you are a busy person with a career and or with children or if you have more free time and less responsibility, honing on to cleaning the house is a chore for most of us.
You might be the odd super organized person who never does this, but most of us do more cleaning in the half hour before a visitor arrives than we do in the week prior. You know the stress involved! Rushing around in a frenzy, wondering if it is physically possible to present the place looking decent in such a short time.
At the best of times, when we say: I’m staying in to do housework, it sounds as if we are surrendering to the inevitable. Why is keeping our house in order often interwoven with such anxiety for the majority?
I believe this is a modern condition and we can release ourselves from the dust monster by going back to basics.
The secret to never have to clean again, is to replace the intention. We are so deeply indoctrinated by the modern world that this might sound vague. But it is simple.
Just beautify
All the cleaning and tidying flows through in joy when the intention changes.
Take a section of your house or a section of a room. The section can be just a pot plant, or one shelf or even half a shelf or an entire room. Spend time in it with no other intention than just to make it beautiful. Forget about the needs and measures that the advertisement instil in you, forget about what your friend has done in her house, forget about what is in the shops.
What can you do to this tiny part of your world to make it beautiful, in a way that when you look at it or when you are near it, it makes your heart sing? Beautify it as if it is your secret sanctuary, your magical retreat; pay no regard to what anyone else might think. And forget about the rest of the house in relation to this section. Also, stop thinking about what to buy for it, use only what you have. It can always be changed and modified later, but for now, enjoy your time in your space.
Everyone is looking to find beauty somewhere else. Here; you have a blank canvas of your desired size to create a small beautiful world in it. Create!
Me Time
To beautify? You might think that you are too busy for such luxuries or that you are only interested in getting the place good enough for functionality.
If you are too busy for the indulgence of taking the time to beautify a corner of your world for yourself, then you are one in most need of such a time, and I recommend a dose of it for your happiness. You do not need to allocate so much time; you can start by putting 5/10/15 minutes for this in the next week/month. You will see that the benefit outweighs the - I was going to say torture! - but you will feel that it is a joy rather than a sacrifice.
Once you have done one section and basked in the rewards for a while, then allocate another section and do the same. Vacuum Cleaner, duster, vinegar, or scrubbers are not there to clean, but tools to aid you, as flowers or ornaments or even the empty space and light are each implements towards beauty.
Allocate a space and a time (the length and breadth of both is entirely up to you)…and meet yourself there, full of heart and joy, with only one intention: to beautify. And go wild there. It is your magical me-time.
An Organic Journey
Do you remember the twitchy nose of Samantha, The Witch? You can do that too – but Hollywood fast forwarded the process and the result as it always does.
I started this process very slowly. A while back, I sectioned my house in order to beautify and I was in no hurry. Change of intention happens gradually and gets instilled more and more in time.
I had 118 sections to do in my house and I didn’t care how long it takes me to personalize, beautify and create sacred space an inch at a time if need be. My time allocation was 5 minutes at a time to start with and even now, I don’t spend more than 15 minutes on it unless I get carried away which is so pleasurable that I happily allow it.
If you had seen my flat 5 years ago, and then see it now, you’d think Samantha had twitched her nose at it. The truth is I was Samantha and the magic happened by me, but not instantly. The time it has taken has been amazing, as the mentality that went into beautifying one corner, has rippled itself into other aspects of my life. I’ll get into this more later. Please don’t be daunted by how long it takes for you to go through the whole house. It doesn’t matter. The fact is, once you start on this path, you tend to go back to the sections that you have already beautified, and you will change and re arrange and create new energies in as you yourself change. This process is as joyful, dynamic and organic as life itself. And you will look forward to your me-times making your world more beautiful.
And the times when you are not spending on that corner, you will feel blissful energies when you look at it. This is the magic.
Sentimentality is not trapped in objects alone
While you are beautifying, you will find that you are inevitably decluttering. This might bring in a different stress. I felt it at times while I was going through it as they were items that I felt guilty to discard. But let me bring you some facts:
You are either hoarding items because you feel you might need them in the future, or you are keeping little treasures because of their sentimental values.
Fear of future - There are numerous books and articles and television programmes about the psychology of hoarding. They all indicate to one underlying issue. Fear of scarcity (Loss).
I had a studio in my flat in which I did my arts and craft and writing. My interest was vast, from polymer clay to paper-craft to wire jewellery to lacemaking, felting and crocheting to making clothes and much more. During the years I spent a fortune buying tools and supplies and I kept them all in a room which resembled Aladdin’s cave. As it was hard to find anything in there, I kept buying duplicates of the tools and supplies as I forgot I had them! I had more supplies in there that could possibly be used in a lifetime!
And the energy of the room had become so suppressive that I used to do most of my arts and crafts in another room! I thought maybe I ought to move my studio to that room, as I loved the light and the space there.
The process of moving the studio upstairs, made me see what a ridiculous amount of stuff I had been hoarding, most of them, I never used, and kept only because I had paid for them and felt I MIGHT be needing them one day.
What I needed today, was SPACE filled with blissful energy. And I got rid of huge amount of my tools and supplies – I literally gave them away to friends and charities. I am now back in the original studio. Which has perfectly relevant items that I need now. One thing crafters don’t see is how much we are influenced by those who take advantage of the renaissance of craft and by their clever advertising. They love us to become Jill/Jack of all trades and Master of none, because that way we buy more and more and more. I will get into the importance of mindfulness in your beautifying journey later. Mindful purchases, differentiate what really is inspiring to what the sellers dress as inspirational. There is distinct difference.
The security of knowing that if you need anything in the future, you can find it, gives you permission to let go of what you hold on to ‘just in case’. There is no need for them now – and unless it is an important part of your work, you really can let go of them.
Weight of the past - This is you holding on to the hooks from the past or cushioning yourself against fear of future. Anything you hold on to from the past, contains the energies of the past. You might feel these energies are precious, and if they are making you feel good, do keep them. But if not, don’t hoard them. If you have a room full of memorabilia from childhood and you are not using them as a business investment, then you don’t need all of it. Keep whatever enhances the now and give the rest away. You still are revering what is precious about them, but with less items, you are respectfully allowing less items to be claimed by dust.
For me this was a huge challenge. When my grandparents and my father passed away, all that was precious from our lineage came to my possession. Things that I grew up with, things that my father grew up with. How could I possibly part with them? Some of these were so beautiful too!
One day I realized that I don’t have anything among these antiques that belonged to my great grandparents or from anyone prior to that. What happened to their stuff? I don’t have them, and I am ok about it.
I then realized that I don’t have children to leave this stuff to. So if I kick the bucket today, these would probably be spread among my landlord and neighbours families and their ebay pages as well as to charity shop.
When beautifying every section, I used one item from my sentimental inheritance, but realizing that these are only mine to enjoy or be burdened with, after asking the extended family if they want anything, I donated the rest away. What I have now, are used objects enhancing the feel of my house. You might not have the inherent minimalist nature as I do, but I am sure you can identify enough to give what can be given away, to family, museums, charity shops or paying customers and keep only that which adds to your intention of beauty and joy in your house.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness seems to be the trendy word these days. The solution or the aid to every ailment, the way to attain enlightenment and the ever-ready formula of becoming like Thich Nhat Hanh.
We seek to reach mindfulness the same way we sought success in the eighties – a struggle to attain a goal. Though mindfulness carries more integrity and is personally at hand.
To never have to clean your house again as a chore, mindfulness is a must. What is the point of spending ages to beautify but at the same rate bring in more clutter, more stress and more ugly in?
The house remains beautiful, clean, and sacred if we apply mindfulness in our life. Because if you are mindful in what you should have around you, you can de-clutter easier, you will buy items with a sense of purpose and responsibility, you will discern what is bliss and what is stress, you will appreciate and care for what you have. Mindfulness will make us see beauty and create beauty and maintain beauty in a slower, cherished pace.
You remember when I wrote: Set a time and place and meet yourself there? Just doing that will make you mindful. Time, space, and you with the blissful intention of joy and beauty brings the Gestalt of the moment into focus. About the very core of life: What matters NOW.
As Within So Without
I emphasise that you can beautify your home a small section at a time – purely because whether you want it or not, as you beautify that corner of your home, some part of your psyche also gets de-cluttered, cleaned and beautified. Step by step what you do outwardly will resonate and is responded to by your inner world. This in turn reflects on your behaviour and habits. In time, you will see how as your surrounds becomes neater, more beautiful and relevant to Now, your relationships, work and social life imitates to be neater, more beautiful and relevant to Now.
As within so without – as without so within. This effect is inevitable. And it starts with you setting a time and place to meet yourself with the intention of beautifying that space.
Back To Basics
Here, we come back to the root. To eliminate the stress of cleaning your house, while having a beautiful home we have to go back to the basics.
Particularly since the Industrial Revolution, we have been hell bent on moving away from nature. Our governing bodies, our educational and social establishments, our commerce and profession even how we look and dress has been fuelled by judgement and competition. The pressure is so extreme that it has taken over our thought process, behaviour, and lifestyle choices individually and nationally and to a great extent globally.
There is no room in this article to delve into what extent this system is detrimental for our well-being and happiness but suffice to say that this system feeds on stress. And to change our mind-set and ways to be free from the stress yet still a part of the community takes some undoing.
Our ancestors held special times and places sacred. This sacredness was in reverence to life and loved ones, to their environment and all living beings; it was not a religious/cult-ish ritual that was done mindlessly or out of fear of hell or persecution. They were present in sacred ceremonies as an act of love and appreciation, for healing of self and others and for energizing and rejuvenating their life at that time.
I would like to invite you to contemplate on those ways and perhaps in small ways introduce them in your lives. Using intentions to deliberately slow you down and help you focus on joy and delight, on where and when life happens and matters, this present moment.
By setting a space and time to meet yourself, with intention of beautifying a section of life, you are answering to a natural, peaceful, and sacred call of life.
Try it!